The Best and The Worst of Me

tear me apart, toss me into the wind,
let me ride it up then down again.
maybe all these feelings will blow away.
you wanted me, well baby, you got the best and the worst of me.

you make your case, throw that book at me,
i'll tell you anything you want to hear.
and if i'm lucky you'll believe i can change.
you asked for me, well baby, i gave you the best and the worst of me.

my brain is always shifting gears. you're my neutral,
i need time to fine tune me.
miracles are just hard work finally paying off.
you said you needed me, well baby, this is the best and the worst of me.

hang on to my upswing, the mood will change,
there's a hand at this wheel that's not mine.
you can't keep up with all my sharp turns.
you wanted to follow me, well baby, it goes both ways the best and the worst of me.

take your time to decide, our fates have intertwined,
the knots are already tied.
this rope can hang or save us.
you said you love me, well baby, you got to love both the best and the worst of me!

Parasitic Host

i wrap myself up in my personal make believe;
hunkered down and ready to defend every delusion i have left to the end!
i'm not dumb!
reality is not my friend.
i'm ugly.
i'm fat.
i'm hosting a parasite and it's all my fault!

i crawl into bed and surrender to the game.
i can't take one more heartache or one more broken promise.
even my appliances are dying!
i know i have to go into the world tomorrow.
i accept the fact i have to function to eat, but i won't accept defeat.
i'm escaping from this drudgery.
i'm grabbing my dreams and losing myself in them.

i don't always know what i want and i never seem to get what i need.
the tediousness of my waking seconds depresses me.
i tried to be better.
the odd in me suffered.
my blood runs backwards like all my lover's leave me.
i find comfort when i'm asleep.
i twist and turn out all the knots when my eyes are closed.

i wake up into uncertainty and confusion.
i break!
my closeness to insanity varies from hour to hour.
i have my little moments of victory that get me through the day.
all i ask for is quiet, but the static stalks me.
he has left me.
i'm not surprised.
i can't undo me.
i'm becoming one with solitude.
chit chat bores me.
nothing engages my senses.
i want to stay here and hide.
one day maybe when the parasite dies i'll bother to try!