life out of focus, i'm spinning out of control.
heartbroken and adrift, lost in a sea of misery.
a quirky beat mocking me on the air.
the taste of eucalyptus upon my tongue.
the feel of a bitterly frigid breeze against my exposed flesh.
unresponsive to outside stimulation,
i remove myself from my thoughts.
i don't want anyone to notice that i'm falling apart.
defenses compromised by your blue eyes.
breaking off into an unsettling happily ever after montage.
urging my mind into a dissociative event to slam the brakes.
dancing around the insanity of falling in love.
the circulation leaving my feet as they fall asleep.
muscles cramping up so intensely i want to weep.
i don't dare move from this uncomfortable chair
for fear you'll see the effect you have upon my soul.
expectations must be managed.
feelings need labeled, organized, and put away into their proper places.
messy isn't an option with your friendship.
the markers have been set.
we measured twice and you cut me once.
i'm now only 1/2 of the whole i once was.
summer's heat has faded into an autumn's dawn.
the blur of days leaves me breathless and dazed.
love is an illusion used to move cheesy merchandise.
emotional creatures are better off drowning in their tears.
but you are on to me and i love it when you are inside of me.
idiots are smarter then my heart.
take one of your axes and cut it out.
surround myself with onions since it's the garlic to your vamparic ability for my complete surrender.
chanting my new mantra, this won't hurt at all,
i start packing up my useless desires
another weekend in your presence to push back my fears.
followed by a Monday withdrawaling from my addiction to you.
the crooked line has ben drawn between your heart and mine.
it bends in your favor.
i'll repeat this brutal cycle, until you want it to stop
because i already realize you are calling all the shots.
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