What I Need

i cry alone in the darkness of my home.
i feel invisible and forlorn.
i then hear a voice, soft and sweet,
it speaks to me, you are not invisible to me.
my child, i see you clearly.
every emotion you feel comes to me too.
do not think you are alone,
because my spirit is always with you.

i felt better that night.
i said a prayer of gratitude
for the love of God and his gentle reminder,of who i am.
my load is lightened.
i go about my life at peace,
until my heart gets broken again.

i sit in the darkness of my home.
i wonder if God has forgotten me.
why must i suffer this way?
then i hear the voice again,
soft but firm, i am reprimanded.
i have not forgotten you,
but you have forgotten me.
my child, when you are suffering
I hurt a thousand times more.
If you'd listen more often,
you'd understand, that this is what you need.

i am humbled and embarassed.
i say a prayer filld with my heartfelt repentance.
my troubles are lifted from me.
i am focused and at peace.
Thank you God for not giving up on me!

now i travel lightly through life.
i listen for his directions at every fork in the road.
i pray often every day for him to guide me.
when i get lost, his gentle voice corrects me.
He is a loving tolerant father,
admonishing his wayward child,
not with fury but with love.
i always find my way when i have faith God knows what i need.