Deformed

i am deformed.
my scars are too big to hide.
their ugliness fills others with shame.
they avert their eyes away from me.
cut me, dissect me, take me apart
they try so hard to find my soul,
but it escaped from me a long time ago.

emotions bounce around me.
my emptiness swallows the sounds.
i have tried to hide in plain sight,
but someone always finds me out.
i don't belong.
i am not normal.

i've never experienced perfection.
my life is more instant karma then walking on sunshine.
i get kicked even after i am already down.
i can't recall a happy ending.
there has always been someone ruining it.

i am deformed.
my heart has turned to stone.
i've passed on many opportunities,
those people reaching out to fix me.
analyze me, medicate me, pray for me
they try so hard to reach my soul,
but its not home, it abandoned me a long time ago.