Confession

it's time for my confession.
forgive me father for i have sinned.
now, i'm not a catholic,
but i still believe.
even when life sucks i have faith.
faith, that someday there will be a better day.

i'm not perfect.
i follow my heart to the point
where it damages my soul.
i think too much
and i feel even more.

i allow doubt to take over
and i take his name in vain.
i say Jesus in hushed tones,
for no reason,
i don't know if he's the answer to everything.

i get upset when people refuse to make a decision,
because their prayers have not been answered.
Ain't nothing wrong with praying,
but i was taught God's a guiding star
and not a work horse.

if you're disappointed in me,
i don't think hail Mary's will fix it.
and which bible is truly God's word?
which translation is without flaw?

i am full of repentance,
but i repeat my mistakes.
so i believe i remain unforgiven,
until the lesson finally takes.
my heart wishes more then it should.

i've fornicated outside of marriage.
i enjoy the company of men.
i gave birth before i was wed,
but i don't think i'm damned.
it's merely an incomplete portrait of the woman i am.
I hope God understands, one day, i'll figure it out.

i confess i'm not perfect,
but i hope you get that.
i love you.
i believe one day, i'll forgive me.
and God and I will be able to agree,
that i am good enough for him.

Depression Confession

I must confess I'm too damn depressed.
I want to be alone.
I don't care that you don't like it.
I can't hear myself think.
I just want to sleep.
Go Away!

Let me wallow in my misery.
Let me cling to my self-pity.
I got too much shit dragging me down.
I don't want you around.
I'm too damn depressed for company right now.

I swear you have to leave.
I won't be responsible for what you see.
I'm breaking down.
Every mistake and all my regrets have me cornered.
All the feelings I've supressed have taken over.

I confess I'm too damn depressed.
I'm no good to you.
You need to go.
I have to be alone.
My depression confession is a full blown tear driven storm.

I'm too damn depressed for you.
I want to be left alone.
Just me and my fear and
All the pictures from past happy years.