Fertile with Faith

i have some crazy wishes
like a dog on a leash
my desires keep me chained to you
the pleasures you give me keep me here

i long for the safety of being alone
love always conquers rational thought
i want to run but i can't escape
i'd miss you and that makes me the fool
every where i go you're near me

my actions contradict my words
i say i'm letting you go
that i can't forgive you
but your siren song lures me back again

you are wrapped up like a pretty gift
i long to open you
i'm fertile with faith
and i'm ready to be your baby once more
your mannerisms shift and again i'm out in the cold

Randomness

i have found strength when i thought i had none.
i took a leap of faith when i fell in love with you.
my past stunted my growth,but my future has appeared.

why can't i be brilliant?

i think it is time to get back on the horse.
i need to lasso my imperfections,
put the proverbial horse back in the barn.

i remember what matters.
i have to learn to want what i already have.
perfection and human are contradictions.

all my random thoughts tackle me.
peace has come at last.
i succumb to the darkness within me.
now it is time to sleep.

Look a Penny

what was i doing?
where was i going?
i hate when i do that!
my train of thought jumped the tracks
and it ain't coming back.

when did i become the forgetful one?
i think my brain is rotting.
the knowledge is disappearing.
my life is going to fade away
and no one will remember me.

sadness plays me like a violin.
sheltered from reality,
i want to fly south
and keep myself locked away,
before i hurt the ones i love.

my tears drop into my bubble bath.
the cherry blossom scent masks the smell of my disappointment.
i try not to stutter.
i know my reaction was stunted,
but i was caught off guard.
i don't know how to respond when you tear me down in one breath,
then compliment me in your next.

my brain doesn't fire rounds as quickly as your mouth does.
the trigger sticks and is hard to pull like molasses.
the cold has me confused,
there i go and use the wrong words with you again.
i want to hoard you in my bedroom,
seal you in behind the clutter of my love.

what was i doing?
what point was i trying to make?
i started this then stopped;
it's been an hour since i first had this thought.
all is lost to time's unrentless march.
oh, look a penny, it's so shiny!