A Bunch of Words

uninspired
depressed
worthless
feelings as words collapse me inward

doubts
fears
disappointments
all that i have makes me see what i lack

i'm caught up in a game i don't know how to win
i twisted my arm, but i can't forgive
i have two left shoes on
that's the way love dresses me

cold
gray
windy
mother nature matches my mood

slippery
icy
steep
i'm sick of falling down the slopes i'm on

i'm overwhelmed to the point of implosion
i want to runaway to find some sun
the car is out of gas
i guess i'm stuck here in my best dress

nothing
empty
closed
it all adds up to a negative

denial
broken
shattered
i can't make sense of this

i'm not looking for a ten
i thought for once i got lucky
but this is just a bunch of words
that never add up to a life that's worthy

Kill Myself

What am I doing?
Who am I kidding?
I mess up everything I touch.
I'm a walking, talking one woman wrecking ball.

I'm a clutz.
I'm a duntz.
Stamp Loser on my forehead.
Black ball me.
Execute me.
Toss me to the curb.

I'm my own worst enemy.
No one can hurt me more then I do myself.
If there's a way to screw it up I'll find it.
I'm gonna get myself killed one day.
I'm gonna get myself killed one day.

I walk under ladders.
I love black cats.
I never win anything.
I even lose more than I have.
I see numbers backwards.
I walk into posts.
I'm a habitual whiner with an appetite for cheese.
My skill is annoying people.
I excel at it so well that people want to hurt me.
Oh, well.

I'm my own worst enemy.
No one can hurt me more then I do myself.
If there's a way to screw it up I'll find it.
I'm gonna get myself killed one day.
I'm gonna get myself killed one day.

I fall down unexpectedly.
I trip over my own two feet.
I bite my tongue in my sleep.
I swallow when I should spit.
It's disgusting isn't it?
I can't help myself.
I want to hange myself.
Put the hemp rope away.
I can't go out to play.
I always have a headache.
I'm always cranky.
It's always been a bad day.

I'm gonna end up getting myself killed one day.
It'll be accidental.
It'll be weird.
I'll be the darwin award winner.

I'm gonna get myself killed one day.