Bad Bug

that's a bad bug, leave it alone, it's a bad bug!
it'll sting you until you're numb;
until your throat swells shut,
and you think you're going to die, it's a bad bad bug!

that's a bad bug, let it go on, it's a bad bug!
it turns your insides out;
leaves you weak and shaking on the floor,
and you pray to die, it's a bad bad bug!

i'm sitting in the spring sunshine fighting an urge to cry.
my stomach rolls like a thunder storm.
my ribs ache from all the sickness i've expunged.
i prayed for mercy then i begged for death!

that's a bad bug, take it far away, it's a bad bug!
it overcomes you and takes control;
you aren't you anymore,
and you become just a ball of disease trying to breathe, it's a bad bad bug!

that's a bad bug, wash down all the pills to kill it, it's a bad bug.
the pain comes crashing in waves of vomit and tears;
both ends explode into misery,
and i'm chained to the bathroom like a slave to its master, it's a bad bad bug!

there's not freedom in the pink you drink.
every second i think death has arrived.
if this is living then death can't be that bad.
i prayed to find a chemical to release me from this nightmare.

that's a bad bug, it crawls inside of you and eats you alive, it's a bad bug.
it's tearing me apart one retch at a time;
i'm huddled in the corner knowing i'm going to die,
and all i feel is relief, it's a bad bad bug!

Bugs

driving down this endless road,
my hand out the window,
trying to catch the wind.
the bugs sting my palm as their
guts stain my hand red.
i try to focus on the lights ahead,
but the darkness swallows them one by one.

i keep running.
i don't know why.
i'm not searching for anything,
because i know there's nothing to find.
i think as little as possible.
i'll stop running when my pain ends.
but i don't know when that'll be.

i keep my head down as the strangers walk past.
my eyes have secrets and
i keep my secrets to myself.
i'd seek forgiveness for my sins
if i thought my soul was worth it.

i keep running.
i never get tired of the path.
i circle around when i get to a dead end.
i know my running will never end.
i can't out run this pain i'm in.

if i dare to remember the pain rips me in half.
there's too many emotional bombs set to go off in my past.
relflection gets me nothing but misery.
i'm neck deep in fake sympathy.
no one understands, so i keep running.
until one day i pray my pain will end.