Sunshine

i'm sunshine on a cloudy day
no one sees me shine away
the addiction is overwhelming me
the mess left behind blinds me
i dig around the old hiding places
today i shined but tomorrow i need more
or i will get left behind

i heard the right words in my head
but those are never the ones that come out my mouth
i can't stop my own train wreck
these actions are half-cocked
i run off into sunshine and drive into deep water full of sharks

i get it right one time out of 100
but all you remember is the 99 i screwed up
there's no good way here
only my flaws show the worst foot forward
i'm still here eating the fallout of my mistakes
hoping one day someone sees me shine

Can Do

i can do this on my own
you get used to the guilt
the bed doesn't seem empty anymore
it just swallows you up to keep you warm
i don't feel lonely anymore
i feel relieved
no more tears and no more fears
i only answer to myself
i'm no longer held up to someone else's impossible standards
i have everything i need

i feel lighter
i think clearer without all your hot air surrounding me
i've reflected enough on the why
i'm doing myself proud
other people's happiness doesn't drag me down
life just got simpler

i smile to myself more often
don't feel sorry for me
i've finally set myself free
i no longer hold on to the cliches
this is paradise
i got all my stuff just the way i want it
the toilet seat is always down
i'm a big girl now

i can do this on my own and damn i do it good