You Kill Me

your arrogance overwhelms me.
your own ego fuels your narcissistic delusions.
you changed your path without telling me.
you had to focus and i was distracting you.
instead of sharing you closed up shop.
you abandoned me alone and in the proverbial dark.

you kill me... you didn't dump me... you killed me!
i'm not on your list for updates.
you've got to keep moving forward.
these are your choices and i get to suffer their consequences.
you kill me... that no fault attitude stabs me... you killed me!

how do two people get so far out of sync?
you ignore and then you destroy what you helped to create.
then you try to place all the blame on me.
it takes two to make a mess this big,
but you don't think i'm worthy to share your life.
you left me confused and lost while you found your zen.

you kill me... you pass judgement like you're God... you kill me!
take your precious life lessons and shove them up your own ass.
i don't need you to tell me i'm real.
my broken heart and depression yell it at me loud and clear.
you don't believe in anyone but yourself.
you kill me... you're a taker... you killed me!

i gave you everything i had and now there's nothing left.
you couldn't see past your own needs.
now you've changed and set a new course without me.
i have to adjust to the lack of your domination.
it's not too hard, because now i can breathe!
you killed me and that set me free!!!!

Rent Free

a couple of clicks of the mouse and i sent your cheating heart out to her.
she was clueless, but now she's aware.
you aren't up on her pedestal anymore.
i shot an arrow through all of our hearts.

you told me you'd never talk to me again.
the fallout from you was expected.
i'm hoping now that the cord between us has been so coldly severed i can move on from you.
you weren't good to me.
i'm a person, but you only took from me.

i feel in control finally.
i'm sad she had to be caught in the middle.
i have to take what i've learned from you dominance of me.
i can't let you live rent free in my head anymore.

my stomach turns at the thought of coming face to face with you.
so far you've stayed away.
i didn't mean to chase you off of facebook or out of your apartment.
time will heal these wounds too!

i know you'll twist my words into what you need.
i wasn't able to tell you our relationship was hurting me.
when you touch me i lose all my senses.
there was only one way i could think to end this.
i crossed that line and now i need to stay strong.

i didn't matter to you.
you hurt me again and again and i LET YOU!!!
i have to accept that i created my own cage and gave you the key.
i have to answer to myself why i let you use me without mercy.
i have forgiveness in my heart for you,
and with time it'll get better for all of us!

Top of the World

I went to the top of the world. I looked around. Then I turned you down. How do I get ahead by sleeping around? No thank you. I’ve done been down that route. I got one path calling to me, it’s the one where I be myself. It’s rocky and I fall a lot. I get scraped and bruised and I learn a little bit at a time. But I keep climbing on it finding my own way back to the top of the world just being me.

Sacrifice unselfishly to do it my way. I can’t compromise this time. I look stupid from where you’re sitting. But the world’s mine for the first time it’s working for me. I can see a future clear as day. I got a plan it’s one day at a time. I do what needs to be done. Along the way I found someone. I was hiding behind your shadow afraid to bask in the sun. I’ll pass the flask of freedom on. I got enough to keep me strong. I’ll reach my goals just being me.

I’m free and wild. I’m confused and smiling. I’m looking towards the horizon hoping my dreams come true just being me. I don’t know who else I can be. I may not always like me but I know me and one day I’ll see it wasn’t all bad and it wasn’t all good but I got there doing things my way. What’s wrong with being me? I’m finally free. My façade is crashing down. It feels so good to let it all hang out. Pretending for you was wearing me out. I was forgetting my beliefs. I was losing my dreams. I am clawing my way back from the cliff. I see me, it’s been too long. You had me all wrong.

I’m the one that got lost. But now it’s better. I walked out on my own terms. I tore apart the chains you had me in. I will succeed or I will fail but I will do it just by being myself. All I can ever be is me.