Gone with the Sunrise

how many days will it take for these blues to go away?
when will my heart finally be whole again?
inside of my mind all i have is unanswered questions.
inside my heart there's unrequited love.
i'm searching for solutions to all the above.

he seduces me with his hazel eyes
and husky voiced phrases, like you're beautiful.
it's everything i wanted to hear,
but the doubts still call out, he's a liar.
they're all liars.
i need him to keep the pain at bay,
but he won't be here forever.
he's like all the others, gone with the sunrise.

when will i be loved for who i am?
what am i doing wrong with all these men?
why can't i sustain a relationship with them?
am i that broken?
my mind swirls and twirls over every failed attempt at happily ever after.
my heart is a blank open book.
i'm searching for resolutions to all the above.

he winks at me and grins while he kisses my neck.
charm and sweetness are dripping from his tongue.
he's handsome and smooth.
he says he's different, not to worry, he's sticking around.
i love the script he's reading from, but my fears are on high alert.
he's lying.
they'll say anything to get laid.
i only want him so i can spend one less night alone.
he won't be here forever.
he's like all the others, gone with the sunrise.

so'm i'm still asking questions that hurt.
i still want answers, but know they won't come easily.
change and i aren't well aquainted.
but i know true love doesn't happen on your own.
so i'll go through a million sunrises if that's what it takes to get it right!

A Tall Cold Glass of Revenge

you know what really pisses me off about you?
everything you touch explodes!
you just can't leave a room,
you gotta stomp out like you're squishing ants.
i call you out for the liar you are.
i knocked you out of your comfort zone.

you tried to laugh the truth away.
when you couldn't escape the fire,
you ran for the exit but i blocked the way.
so you went off on me,
like a massive super nova.
you tried to burn me,
but i'm not the one who cheated.

i played the fool and fell in love
with the blackhole that passes as you.
you made me suffer.
now i've drenched you in the combustableness of your own hot air.
you may leave here alive,
but i've beat you at your own game.
i smashed your stupid pride into a thousand pieces of crap!

i sip on a tall cold glass of revenge,
enjoying the view of you scrambling around,
trying to make amends.
there's nothing better then arriving angry
and leaving with peace of mind my friends!

Player Jack

He’s a one-eyed jack
Charismatic pirate in a dead head tie
Who likes to love them
And leave them behind
He will slither past your defenses
And swallow your heart whole
Even a chameleon couldn’t see where he hides his heart

You’re always chasing what you can’t have
Hoping to hit the proverbial pot of gold
But you keep getting the Cracker Jack prize
Close your eyes and what do you see?
It’s a picture perfect image but he’s not what he seems

He does it all with a smile
That says, ‘Try to catch me if you can’
And then he’s gone on
To the next little tramp that will drive him wild

He likes his camels
He likes his coffee
And his beer
Other than the occasional frolic in the woods
He couldn’t care
If he was all alone for the rest of his life
It’s men like him that fuel young girls fantasies
It’s men like him that put women into therapy

I knew

Self absorbed in the negative my ego’s barely registered.
I’m better with food in my mouth. It keeps me out of trouble.
I lie. It’s a simple fact. I open my mouth and out spills insanity.
If I don’t know I make it up. It works but it sucks when I get caught.

I feel that the T.V. hates me. It never tells me anything good.
I change channels all night long, but I find nothing to interest me.
Yet, I don’t turn it off. It’s enslaved me.
I want to see what will be next. I can’t miss it.

If I hear it’ll be Okay one more time I think I’ll scream.
I’ve waited 20 years for okay to come and it hasn’t.
I’ve seen bad and I got to meet worse. Devastation was horrible to me.
Death came and wouldn’t go away without taking half of me with him.
I still touch my pain, it reminds me to feel.

I cry thinking someday I’ll heal, so I keep picking at my scab to keep it fresh and bleeding because I don’t want to forget you.
I look both ways before I cross the street. I pay my taxes.
I dot my I’s and cross my t’s. If there’s a rule then it’s a rule for me.
I don’t dare color outside the lines. My fear of being caught paralyzes me a lot.

I dabble in sin. Never dipping too far in.
But one day I met this man, that’s when I fell deeper, so deep into the well.
You’d think I’d think before I leapt onto him.
I knew better but I still went into never never land holding his hand.
He’s telling me lies and I tell myself it’s truth.

This works until he leaves then I hurt. And he always leaves.
He has to go. His family is waiting for him at home.
Regret upon regret. I’m my own worst enemy.
I’ve done it again to me. My mistakes get grander every time.
What can I say? I have no excuses.
I knew. I knew. I knew.

Empty Promises

Empty promises, full of lies
Smoke and mirrors mystify
Dreams go by
You’ve missed your chance
This is goodbye

What does NO mean to you?
How can I tell you…?
I don’t want to see you anymore.
I am past my loser phase.
I need a man to lean on
A man with love to give
And not a past chaining him down

You walk in a mist of your own lies
Make believe stories where
You are the good guy
It’s never your fault
Everybody is bringing you down
You can’t see the mistakes
Are yours and yours alone
You aren’t taking me down

Empty promises, full of lies
Smoke and mirrors mystify
Dreams go by
You’ve missed your chance
This is goodbye

You are able to justify
A life drifting in loserville
You can see good
Where all that’s left is begging
For a dollar here and there
You wander why no one sticks around
Look in a mirror
Look in a mirror

Are you scared to admit?
The truth hurts
When you can’t take it
Running does no good
It’ll get to you sooner or later
Lies only make you feel better
But emptiness swallows you
Depression hollows your words
You are a shell of a man

Saying what you think you should
Going through the motions
But you think the world revolves around you
So I am cutting the ties
To get away from the misery you spread

Lies

i'm down and out
i'm falling
i'm spinning out of control
don't stop me
don't hold me
don't tell me u love me
lies, liar, leaver

u make the world in ur image
u think ur God
u really revolve around satan's fire
u never dance in the rain
ur ignorance is somehow my pain

i'm sad
i'm lost
i'm becoming a ghost
don't stop me
don't hold me
don't tell me u love me
lies, liar, leaver

u say the sweetest words
u smile to hide ur disease
u think u have immunity
u tell me i'm the disease
no matter what i say ur free and clean

i'm sick
i'm twisting
i'm caught in the wind
don't stop me
don't hold me
don't tell me u love me
lies, liar, leaver
leaver, liar, lies
all i am is ur lies