Name your Poison

name your poison, boy, for you'll i'll get it.
anything you want i can hunt it down.
you light my fire; i thought i was burnt out forever,
but you reignited all of my desires.
it might be a mistake to let you in.
i could be setting myself up for another bad end,
but name your poison, boy, and i'll make me your best friend.

i'll search high and low for whatever floats your boat.
you got me wanting you and it's never enough.
i haven't felt this alive in years.
all you do has me going crazy.
this could be the best or the worst love ever,
but i won't know until i get you where i want you.
name your poison, boy, and i can fulfill it.

every dream you ever had is my command.
you'll never want us to end.
we'll be the love that goes on and on like the song that never ends.
all of our friends will be so jealous.
name your poison, boy, and we can have it all.

vices are a part of life; you've become mine.
if i'm yours then we have all we need to survive.
we'll lay on the bed just drinking each other in.
i'll never be full and you'll never drink again.
we can build our own ivy tower; let the fools try to tear us down.
as long as i'm your poison, boy, it won't do them any good!

Heat in a Moment

it's a dark night, stars and moon are out of sight.
our cooling bodies entangled in the sheets.
the distant worries begin to accumulate.
life is altered from how we've known it.
all in the transfer of our body heat in a moment.
the passion ripples inside our bodies but my heart is unmoved.

i waited years to touch and kiss you.
i wanted you for so long i had almost quit,
but events unfolded like a treasure map.
you were led to me and i embraced you.
i'm not one to think things through
and now that our heat in a moment is at an end...

it's quiet as we lay side by side staring up at the ceiling.
the house could be on burning down and we wouldn't move.
the magic spell of passion's heat in a moment has been broken.
we both are wondering where do we go from here!

this adventure wasn't as fulfilling as i had dreamnt.
i built this moment up in my fantasies and reality tore it down.
my attention span has been redirected and you haven't even left my bed.
as the night slowly turns into day, this heat in a moment fades away.

i'm running like i always do, until another man catches my eye.
i love having a new one to pursue.
the chase is the heat that builds slowly before it ignites me.
one day i'll stop and regret all the love i've let pass me by,
but now i have to tell you good bye.
there's this really good looking guy i want to try!

No More Hugs

akward glances meet nonchalant shrugs, it means no more hugs.
my thoughts linger on the marlboro taste of your kisses.
if i could paint the perfect picture of us i'd paint you nuzzling my breasts.
destitute and desperate, i bet the rest of my love on you.
life keeps showing me there's no such thing as a sure bet,
but my heart refused to believe and we fell for your charms still.

i see the trajectory of your wants like a bullet from a gun.
you ripped through me and continued on with your fun.
there never was any talk of love, just chemical infused suggestions.
if pain feels this good then hurt me some more.
i'm a glutton for you punishments and adore being your whore.

pluck away on my heartstrings, i can't feel their pull anymore.
i'd slash your big hoss tires i could see your fire once more.
the only way i vibrate is when you shake me to my core.
all of this has become an anti-thesis of a bore.

the myopic lullabye of my obsession plays on in my head.
i hum along to your memory as i masterbate myself to sleep.
my flesh and blood has trapped our sin between my ears.
my pride never existed when you were by my side,
but i'd die a thousand times just to taste your cum one more time.

epic love stories like romeo and juliet can't be wrong.
love is the truest when everyone else thinks it doesn't belong.
the poison is the lust that makes the rest of our lives lose its luster.
we shift into overdrive to capture the thrill of life.
only when you and i come together do we get back into the vibe.
my weakness is your touch, i need you to glow!

Every Minute

for every minute i'm up there's 10 that i'm down,
but i hide the sad from you.
your wants supercede mine.
i drift away into impossible thoughts.
knowledge cripples my emotions.
i would abandon reason to be your friend.

our bridge is barely standing.
i keep chipping away at its foundation.
the urge to blow us all to hell tackles me to the ground.
destruction makes me feel.
i don't deserve to be close to you.

you aren't responsible for me.
we were two limbidos doing a vertical limbo.
you can let go because you never held on.
we'll never know how high we could've gone.
i imploded from arguments we only had in my head.
there's a thousands of words i heard that you never said.

crazier things happen every day.
why can't you be with me?
obstacles are meant to be overcome.
there's never still water in your heart.
i'm too unique and hard to forget.
i leave an imprint.

for every minute i spend without you there's 10 i'm wanting to hold you,
but i hide the love from you.
your dreams trump mine.
i build you up in my fantasies.
obsession takes over all logic.
i would kill her to keep you here with me till the end.

Hairy

this is a hairy predicament.
you and i not wanting to commit.
if i could put this in context,
great sexual chemistry,
the kissing is fucking fantastic,
your hairy chest rubbing me into dizzying heights,
but i'm not in your bed at night.
i'm not the woman that holds you tight.
if she knew about me this would be a hairy situation alright!

you're a hairy beast of a man.
an alpha male that dominates me to the end.
my obsession with your touch undoes me every time.
i can't get enough of your hairy ass.
you drive me to the edge of sexual madness,
but i'm not in love with you.
i'm not the woman who adores you.
if she knew about me you'd be in over your bald head for sure!

she loves your hairy back enough for two.
i only want to fuck you every chance i get.
if we were alone as much as you two are i'd be walking funny
and jumping your hairy balls everywhere.
there's no hope this will end on a good note.
the hair is getting tangled and pulled too much.
you love taking me hard and fast,
but secrets don't keep forever.
i'm not the quality woman that she is.
i'm not the woman you risk losing.
one day she'll find out and your hairy ass will be thrown out!

Just a Glimpse

just a glimpse of you puts a silly smile on my face.
just one look from you and i melt.
you have the impact of 9.0 earthquake on my heart.
i can't stop wanting you; you've become a part of me!

just a glimps of you today sent my head spinning.
just one wave and my mood soared.
your mere presence shakes me to my core.
i need you like no other man before.

just a glimpse of your ass makes me wet.
just one touch from you and i surrender it all.
you're the exception to my one rule.
i can't tell you no, it's like the word no longer exists with you around.

just a glimpse of your hands has me wanting them all over me.
just one smile from you rocks my whole world.
you make all my bad thoughts disappear.
i want my world to revolve around you.

just a glimpse of you sends me into ecstasy.
just the hope you'll love me too lights my fire.
you know i've fallen hopelessly in love with you.
i can't wait until i catch another glimpse of you!

Cave In

waiting for you to fall in love with me has become a full-time job.
i've severed contact.
if you really want me you'll have to come and get me.
i'm tired of chasing you.
i think it's sent you on an ego trip.
i'll stay isolated in my fears and held closely in the arms of my doubts.
i hope you'll call, but my lower then lowest levels of hell self-esteem says you won't.

these obsessions that overcome me whisk me away into a wonderful life in my dreams, but never come true.
i want you to be different, but i'm not any different.
so the endings are always the same.
you leave.
i cry.
the cycle remains intact and never ends!
i always cave in!

waiting for my winning lottery ticket to be bought has turned into a full-time day dream.
i don't even have the dollar to buy the ticket.
and being out on sick leave gives me an anemic paycheck.
i'll pay what i can and live to learn to go without the rest.
it's bumpy, this road i've been detoured onto.
my therapist says i'll get better but my brain doesn't agree.

these obsessions that overcome me whip my passions into a frenzy and leave me quickly.
i feel like a cocaine addict coming down, crashing hard into sexual withdrawal.
i'll never have a happy ending, because i'm unchanged.
even these thoughts of death won't leave me be.
i'm going to cave in!

Seek Clarity

should i be worried?
constant trouble rests on my mind
opinions are tossed out hurried
the consensus is i must be blind

time is slipping away from me on a downward slope
gracefullness isn't in my character
can't keep myself dangling on such a short rope
obsession has given me a hair trigger

underneath my calm exterior
lonliness consumes me to the breaking point
obviously, i'm pretending to be cheerier
maybe it's time to make my point

before i speak up i select my words carefully
ecstasy rest upon me seeking clarity

Undivided Affections

"Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth:
for thy love is better then wine." SS 1:2

my mind hangs on the magic of your touch.
these thoughts of mine are backsliding to the sweet sins of flesh.
vanity is unholy and i've underestimated your pull.
there's a fire raging in my heart and fear dancing on my nerves.
i have to find strength to reject this evil.

my madness spreads through to my soul.
i have lost the wisdom of the truth.
my devotion has become a lesson in fragility and sorrow.
the advesary is gifted in disguising lust as love.
God is jealous and demands my undivided affections.
i know where my duty lies.

the afterlife will be bleak if i die steeped in lies.
i am sane right now.
i keep this moment as a souvenir.
i must be blunt with myself.
the way i desire him is the signature of the devil himself.
these temporary obsessions of mine are destructive.
more proof to me that my journey toward heaven will be long and arduous.

"For God shall bring every work into judgement, with every secret thing,
whether it be good, or whether it be evil." ECC 12:14

every thought that has ever been in my head;
every desire that has ever twisted in my heart;
is under review, so i have to learn to control myself more.
i have to pray harder then ever before to resist these temptations.
God deserves my undivided affections.

Indulgence

devotion can't capture how i feel about you
i elevate my heart to heaven
when you call out to me
this feeling spins me around
faster then the speed of light
i'd give up every sin to be your one indulgence

obsession is you dominating my every thought
i create a world just for us
when you say my name
these moments are just the prelude
our symphony will play across the universe
the fat lady will never sing on our love

passion for your every flaw
i know you inside and out
when you breathe i know your next thought
this bond is absolute
our connection runs down to a cellular level
i entwine my very essence with yours

possessions do not matter to us
objects are not what we need to be complete
when we come together we are in sync
the magic we make is a mystery to others
i disappear when you are near
and abracadabra, two become one forever

Outside My Door

i can't pretend you're coming back to me.
all i fantasized about was you loving me.
obsession is a passionless lover.
bitterness is a faithful companion.
you tell me we're still friends,
but that's not good enough in the end.

i know enough to know myself.
i'll have to fight the urge to call.
suppress my need to email.
avoid facebook so i won't like you anymore.
it's so easy to reach out to you,
but you don't want me to!

i am trying to direct myself to another direction,
but i keep circling back around to you.
yeah, it was great while it lasted.
maybe my age makes me desparate,
but men just don't line up outside my door.
i had hoped you would be the last one,
but, alas, i was mistaken.

Run From Me

just had you on my mind
obession's bad for my kind
happiness escapes me every time
no one knows misery better then me

please understand me
help is beyond my reach
i will ride you until you have nothing more to teach
love is a tricky game
life always changes the rules unexpectedly
i never meant to confuse you
perhaps it's best you run from me

people ignore all the signs
attempting to be my friend
results are destruction in the end
leaving right now would be good
endings have never been my forte
time gets away from me
tomorrow i'll change my mind anyway

Fade to Black

You turn me inside out.
You fill me full of doubt.
You are the reason I can't make it out of bed.
I got to get you out of my head.

I see the sky.
I see the clouds rolling by.
I see you.
The thunder cracks and my whole life fades to black.

You tell me secrets to keep.
You love me until I weep.
You built me to be the woman you love,
But I don't love me.
How can that be?

I can see the sky.
I can see the clouds rolling by.
I see you.
The lightening strikes and my whole life fades to black.

You always have the answers.
You know me better then I know myself.
You order for me.
You dress me.
You tell me what I need.
But I want out before I fade to black
And there'd be no me to come back.

It's Over

I can connect the dots.
I can read between the lines.
I know what you're not saying has been on my mind.
It's over, it's over, you've learned your lesson.
The worry isn't worth the pleasure.
You've made up your mind.
It's over, it's over, and you're no longer mine.

It was a brief moment in time.
But it lived up to every expectation I had.
You didn't plan for it to happen.
Neither had I, but it did, but it did
We stole passion when we could.
We enjoyed every second we were there.
But there's too much on your plate.
and you have too much at stake.
It's over, it's over, you say it's over.
It was the first time and it'll be the last.
It's over, it's over, you're no longer mine.

Remember I Love You?

how can i reach the deeper end of your pool
when do i get to see beyond the facade of your beautiful face
where did the real you go
do you even know where to find yourself
please don’t run and hide
it won’t hurt much to let me in
just fall on back without looking and you’ll see
that i will catch you in my arms
you’ll be safe here with me

how can i express how i feel about you?
words seem unable to capture a human soul
even with all the poetry and music in this world
i cannot manage to let you know how much i love you
it is a puzzle i cannot solve
a problem that i cannot resolve

i worry if you knew if you would think less of me
so i hide it and bury the feelings deep in my heart
i figure it doesn’t matter how i feel or what i have to say
you have made your mind up and that’s very clear
you and i aren’t meant to be
so i will sit and watch how life unfolds
with my feelings of love for you never told

Over and over i keep telling myself that love really doesn’t matter
i can be whole without having you to hold
but i feel like there is this huge black hole sucking out my soul
life just seems so dull without a spark of love
to keep my fires burning & to keep my heart churning

i just sit around these days doing nothing
my love is growing stagnet and moldy
i doubt even if i was given the chance to love you
that i don’t remember how to love a man
it has been so long ago since i had to tell a man ‘i love you’
that i am fearful i have lost the ability to utter the phrase
i am so scared of being hurt and torn apart
that i have built a fort of defenses to keep you out
i don’t know how the gate works to let you in

so i will sit here watching the sun go across the sky
praying the sun will make me go blind
so i won’t have to see you loving someone else
i will pretend again that i don’t love you
and i will let your life unfold without you knowing i love you

While You Were Gone

While you were gone, I thought about you every 5 seconds
I wondered if you were doing the same
I counted the seconds until you’d be home
While you were gone, I dreamed you were in my bed every night
I hoped you were alone in your bed every night
I wished you’d call me and say Hello
While you were gone, I convinced myself to let you go
I thought you didn’t matter to me anymore
I knew I was better off without you here with me
While you were gone, I went through an emotional epiphany
I made decisions on my own without your input
I went out alone and enjoyed it
While you were gone, the days got longer and the nights got shorter
The weather got warmer and rain came.
The weather got colder and snow came
While you were gone, I went back and forth
I couldn’t figure out what I needed from you
I wanted to know if I could do it by myself
While you were gone, I lost five pounds
I stopped eating chocolate for one week.
I lightened my hair to a strawberry blonde.
While you were gone, I contemplated my place in the cosmos.
I tried to picture us living together until we die.
I imagined what are children would look like.
While you were gone, I was sad.
I cried.
I was angry you left me alone.
While you were gone, I gained some perspective.
I took a few steps back on this road.
I fantasized a life where I didn’t need you.
While you were gone, I daydreamed about you.
I calculated what you would say about all this.
I tried to guess your reaction to my news.
While you were gone, I drove myself mad.
I went crazy with thinking what if I did that or this.
I spent way too much time on you.
Now your back and I can’t tell you any of this.
Now your back and it’s like you never left.
Now your back and I don’t know what to do about that.

Every Time

I can’t hide what I feel inside
Everyone knows I love you
I wear my heart upon my sleeve
But you don’t notice how my heart bleeds

Every time you look my way
Every time my tongue gets in the way
Every time I don’t know what to say
You back away
You back away

I try to be so cool
I conceal so many secrets
So what’s one more tucked inside my soul
But somehow everyone knows
Everyone but you

Every time you look my way
Every time my tongue gets in the way
Every time I don’t know what to say
You back away
You back away

I catch glimmers of hope in your eyes
Or is that my own desire
Reflecting back on to me
I don’t know what I really see
But I want so badly to be with you

I am told young love fades
And time will drive these blues away
I desperately want to believe it’s true
But I am so helplessly in love with you

Every time I look your way
Every time my tongue gets in the way
Every time I don’t know what to say
You back away
You back away

I am so devoted
I am in so much pain
So many secrets that I hold inside
But everyone knows how I feel
Everyone sees it
Everyone but you…

I knew

Self absorbed in the negative my ego’s barely registered.
I’m better with food in my mouth. It keeps me out of trouble.
I lie. It’s a simple fact. I open my mouth and out spills insanity.
If I don’t know I make it up. It works but it sucks when I get caught.

I feel that the T.V. hates me. It never tells me anything good.
I change channels all night long, but I find nothing to interest me.
Yet, I don’t turn it off. It’s enslaved me.
I want to see what will be next. I can’t miss it.

If I hear it’ll be Okay one more time I think I’ll scream.
I’ve waited 20 years for okay to come and it hasn’t.
I’ve seen bad and I got to meet worse. Devastation was horrible to me.
Death came and wouldn’t go away without taking half of me with him.
I still touch my pain, it reminds me to feel.

I cry thinking someday I’ll heal, so I keep picking at my scab to keep it fresh and bleeding because I don’t want to forget you.
I look both ways before I cross the street. I pay my taxes.
I dot my I’s and cross my t’s. If there’s a rule then it’s a rule for me.
I don’t dare color outside the lines. My fear of being caught paralyzes me a lot.

I dabble in sin. Never dipping too far in.
But one day I met this man, that’s when I fell deeper, so deep into the well.
You’d think I’d think before I leapt onto him.
I knew better but I still went into never never land holding his hand.
He’s telling me lies and I tell myself it’s truth.

This works until he leaves then I hurt. And he always leaves.
He has to go. His family is waiting for him at home.
Regret upon regret. I’m my own worst enemy.
I’ve done it again to me. My mistakes get grander every time.
What can I say? I have no excuses.
I knew. I knew. I knew.

My World

You’re the light in my life
The day and the night
You’re the one I lean on when times are tight
I can’t think of enough ways to say
You’re my world

When my world ends a new one begins
When there are times of hope
When there are moments of joy
My world of pain seems so far away
When your laughter is in the air
When your smile is shining
That’s when my world ends so a new one can begin

You lift me up when I am down
You help me out when I need it
You are my light in the darkest of nights
I just can’t describe what you mean to me
Words cannot capture your spirit
You are my sun, moon, and stars
You are my world
And I revolve around you

So when I think that the world has ended
I just look at you and a new one begins
So bring the end
And let it take me over
So I can see the birth of your world
And I can feel new again

Guarentee

I see my future looking into your eyes
I know my heart’s desire is being with you for all time
Walk with me
Talk with me
Join me on this path
I guarantee my love will last

I hear you call my name over the loudest crowd
I feel your touch and the world disappears
Dance with me
Laugh with me
Join me on life’s journey
I guarantee my love will last

I taste the sweetness of your lips against mine
I search your soul and find my lifelong mate
Sing with me
Play with me
Join me on this winding road
I guarantee my love will last